As a new homeowner, and a man in his 30’s living life in this crazy world, I can honestly say… I’m getting tired of fixing things. I’ve lost my patience for this. It’s underwhelming, deflating, and quite frankly, boring. I have tried to fix things in the past, and I’ve realized, it’s not for me. Not anymore. Now I’m not talking about the little things. The day to day. That stuff I can live with, and we all have to live with. I can handle that. Grab the metaphorical hammer and nail, the symbolic screwdriver and screwy screws, the worldly wrenches, the nutty nuts and bolts, and all the rest of it. I get it. The day to day is what makes life worth living. It’s a life of learning after all. That satisfaction of problem solving is priceless. But the big things, those massive endeavors and headaches, the stress for no reason, fuck that shit. Some things are simply too far gone to fix. Unrepairable. I’ve earned the right to not have to tackle these projects anymore. Let someone else take care of it. Someone who’s better equipped, and has a better sense of it. Someone who specializes in fixing those types of issues specifically. Those. Very. People. They can iron out the wrinkles. Fasten and buckle down the clamps better than I can. That doesn’t mean I’ll stop trying, or at least attempting to help. I’m not heartless. I just think I need to understand there are limits to what I can do to help, otherwise what ends up happening is frustration and anger over something I simply don’t have control over. Why do I need that type of aggravation in my life? I’m trying to live a life of positivity, and energy giving. But if it isn’t reciprocated, well than it’s all for not. It’s time to let go, and realize you can’t fix everything. And maybe, some of these things aren’t meant to be fixed. In fact, I can guarantee that. Maybe there isn’t a solution. Maybe it’s just life, and time is the only answer. And if that’s the case, it’s just wasted energy to try and be a hero. Time to focus on what I can control, for myself and others. What I can do as a man, and not some savior. Because, you know what I am getting good at? Building stuff and creating things. Making the best out of a situation. Maybe, instead of fixing something that is well past the point of repair, or isn’t meant to be tied down or bound, I should focus on building something new. Creating something out of nothing. Constructing new ideas. Thinking outside of the toolbox. Assembling all that I have to offer and then just going for it. For if you build it, they will come. And when they do, when they are ready. We’ll build something new…together.