Dear READER,

Isn’t R the best letter?
Equally REFINED and ROUGH; an in-betweener.
He’s always thinking a million things at once,
but you wouldn’t know by his demeanor.

He’s not all ROLY-POLY,
like the BIG overbearing letter B.
BEATING his chest, BEING so loud,
getting ANNOYED and CATTY looks from A and C.

R is a laid back RELAXED kind of DUDE.
He is caring, thoughtful and polite.
Not like that DEUSTCHBAG D you see.
That DICK boyfriend that never feels RIGHT.

E ENJOYS to READ and R can’t stand it.
It’s been an ETERNITY since he last read.
Because READING his own work becomes a whole new EDIT,
He’d much rather write something new instead.

R writes about RIDICULOUS things,
like his dating life and FICTION.
But F thinks these are one and the same,
So R and that FUCKER have FRICTION.

A GO GETTER, R is persistent.
He REVELS in the challenge; he’ll GROW.
No wonder R likes G so much.
Initials are like siblings, and G is his bro.

R isn’t a fake like that HYPOCRITE letter H.
HE is genuine, authentic, and REAL.
HE will learn what HE doesn’t know.
HE’LL be HONEST about HOW HE feels.

But I never quite understood that about R,
The game ISN’T as INTERESTING played that way.
R would argue women want the truth no matter what,
and he’s REARRANGING the way the game IS played.

R always tries to do what’s RIGHT,
and sometimes this can be a snore.
But JUST ask J and he might say,
good JUDGEMENT shouldn’t be ignored.

R KEEPS everyone grounded and at bay.
He REGULARLY KICKS negativity to the curb.
He’ll often REMIND K, he’s just an l with sideways v
whenever K happens to get on his nerves.

We’re all LOOKING for LOVE and happiness,
but R RUMMAGES for L in all the wrong places.
He gets caught in the LEAST LIKELY of situations.
He’s a sucker LUSCIOUS LIPS, projects, and pretty faces.

It’s a MIRACLE that you’re still MEANDERING this silly poem;
R is gracious you REACHED this far and didn’t quit.
He MERELY took some R words suggested by someone,
MIXED them all together, and this is what he came up with.

Enough about R, why is M always high?
MUST she always be stuck on go with the flow?
MADDENING to watch her, a frozen RIVER of false dreams.
But R chooses REALITY over ice and snow.

The R words were suggested by the NUANCES of N, and
NOBODY knew the REPERCUSSIONS it would set off.
Writing a poem in an offbeat manner,
with irregular syllables that would make poets scoff.

R is a REALIST, and O is an OPTIMIST.
Are they really that different OR are they the same?
R would say an OPTIMAL balance of both is key,
while O thinks natural urges should be OBEYED.

P can sometimes get annoying,
because he PARTIES all the time.
Where R is PETRIFIED of being in the limelight,
he’s more clever; like a well thought out RHYME.

Yes R is much more QUIET than P,
but don’t mistake that for being shy.
R just happens to have many QUIRKS,
and is QUITE a RESOURCEFUL type of guy.

You see, R does his best to hide certain things,
RECONNAISSANCE until you truly get to know him.
Like did you know he’s a REALLY great RITER?
Spelling always correct; poems in perfect RHYTHM.

If you don’t believe me, just ask S.
Cause SHE thinks SILENCE is golden.
S finds R quite attractive,
Honest, a gentleman, and emotionally open.

R loves the girl next door type,
and S is the best kind of neighbor.
REALLY SWEET and innocent to everyone,
until you get to know her 😉

A THRILL seeker, T is always up for adventure.
RWANDA or RUSSIA, he’s always got a THIRST.
While R is much more TAME, so give him TIME.
R will TRAVEL soon enough, with Iceland being first.

R is UNBELIEVABLY friendly.
He tries to RECONCILE peace between U and V.
Because U wants to beat the daylight out of her,
apparently she’s jealous of V’s body.

But V doesn’t listen to U’s VOCALS or threats,
instead chooses to VERBALIZE with R over beers.
She likes talking to a RECEPTIVE listener
and one who is always ‘I’m all ears’.

He likes his W classy and cute.
His WOMAN will always be treated WELL.
Although he wants her RAMBUNCTIOUS and RISKY in bed.
He WOULD never WHISPER kiss and tells.

R loves going out to the movies,
especially action and Rated R.
But someone should REALLY tell X,
his movies go a bit too far.

This part is dedicated to the letter Y
YOU’RE a great READER, YOU’VE made it this far.
But can YOU be as clever as him?
Can YOU see the sly and wit that makes R…R?

I’m asking for the CEO of the ALPHABAET,
to please have the letter Z REMOVED.
Z is far too ZANY and impossible to work with.
This is the letter R, and it’s my letter to you.

REGARDS,

R